Looking back on Resolutions

I love momental times like this...
the beginning of a new year
the start of a new book

I love beginnings.

It gives me a reason to look back and use this blog efficiently.
That is "why" I blog.
To look back and see what we were doing at this exact moment a year ago..two years ago..and hopefully longer than that if I keep up my blogging habit.

My blog post on Jan 1, 2012 is HERE

I quickly talked about our day and just a couple things I wanted to accomplish this year..

One ....was calling people more and using my thumbs to talk less ...
I can't say I achieved that because I am a texter. I admit it. I text ...a lot!

Two ......was learning more crochet patterns...
I DID accomplish that and I have really enjoyed doing it! I have been making infinity scarves like a mad woman. I love them! I hope they never go out of style.

Three...was running more
I did run more.. not like marathon training running..but running for my health. Of course I stopped when it got amazingly cold outside. But I am looking forward to finding a gym with a nursery for Lyla so I can start back up. I want to lose as much weight as I can while Gregg is at Basic Training.

Four....was taking my photo a day
I think I did pretty good on that. A four year old..two dogs..and a hilarious husband ...pictures get taken all the time!

Five..was to read my bible all the way through
FAIL! Why do I always fail at that? It is sad really. I have read more than five books this year and not one of them were the Bible..the most important book in my life. I did get through a lot of it..but all of it.

Have you started thinking of 2013 Resolutions?
I am narrowing them down..I don't want to have to many..I try to stick with two or three that I can really focus on.

Who am I?

I AM

the mom who does not ask anyone to watch my child for me to get a "mommy" break. I was taught that when I have children they are MY responsibility...not my mothers or anyone else for that matter. She is mine and I will take care of her with all of my being.  

 

I AM

the mom who doesn't like to be away from my child AT ALL..call me clingy..call me whatever...I love my daughter. She will go shopping with me and she will go on vacations with me. If children aren't allowed..I probably won't be able to make it.  

 

I AM

the mom who likes to know what my child is doing at all times..if she has ate..if she is feeling OK..I want to know

I am NOT

the mom and woman who invites people over just to have a sit down dinner at the table and talk. Come over and watch the game, come over and play games, come over and craft and I will feed you..but do not expect a formal dinner and chatting.

 

I AM

that girl who doesn't allow herself to be walked on...my daddy would slap me at the age of 28 if I allowed someone to devalue me. If you respect me and my family..we shouldn't have a problem.  

 

I AM

sensitive and I do have feelings...you might not see them all the time..but they are there..and when I push them down for so long..eventually they will come out and you will see them in full force.

I AM
a woman who believes that you don't say things " because you were mad " ..I think that is a bunch of bull. I think when you are mad is usually when the truth comes out.

I AM
the wife that respects and trusts her husband's judgement. I will go along with what he decides for our family.

 

I AM

a planner...I like to be ahead of schedule and we are always on a schedule.  

I AM NOT

a person who does everything right and I am humble enough to admit that.
 

 

I don't dress up..

I like jeans and a Tshirt 

I love Jesus, Dr Pepper and Cool Ranch Doritos.
My family is my priority.

 

 

my house is never fully cleaned and organized

 

I'm not perfect

but I am me

 

all i can offer is me

us

my side of the story

my view of the world

 

I can offer a house full of humor, love, and dogs

toys and dress up clothes on the floor

my stories 

my thoughts 

a precious little girl growing up before my eyes

pictures ...probably way to many

heartaches and struggles

moments of joy and blessings

I can offer you a viewfinder into my daily life

but what I can't do 

and what I can not offer 

is me being someone I'm not

trying to make everyone happy and just forgetting how i feel and who I am

trying to fit in when I was never really apart of the picture to begin with

I am not going to pretend that my child is dressed cute every day

my shelves aren't dusted, neither is my ceiling fan, 

I don't like to cook and I barely have time to shave in the shower

 

All you get here ...is me...in reality...

and I'm not apologizing..

 

No More Apologies

I think that this has been what God has needed me to go through for a while
a test to see if I am strong enough to be ME
fully me
 

Don't be afraid to tell your story..Don't be afraid to be YOU

YOU ...in reality

Something you have gone through ..someone else is going through now and may need to hear your imperfect story. Every single story is worth telling. Someone will want to listen.

So am i going to start writing short stories and novels...

Ha

No..absolutely not! 

But I am going to write us.. our story ..our life.. in reality.

Here is your viewfinder. I hope you like it.

Are you a Grinch?

Admit it..when the holiday roll around people start to get "Grinch-y"

Some more than others...but we won't go there...
not today

Do you have a friend that really isn't a friend..but you have to include her when your handing out co worker Christmas gifts? ....

Boss?

that English teacher with the huge wart on her nose that makes you swear she was a witch in another life?

ok...moving on...


Try this...

GRINCH PILLS

http://www.craftfabulous.com/2012/11/diy-grinch-pills-aka-green-tic-tacs.html

http://www.craftfabulous.com/2012/11/diy-grinch-pills-aka-green-tic-tacs.html
 

Click on the captions under the pictures to take you to the blog I found it on. So cute. So easy. So full of a not so subliminal message!

Have a great weekend!

No More Apologies

I was blog hopping around and found a blog (please forgive me because I have no idea which blog it was on..if you are reading this and you know what I am talking about ...leave the blog in the comments and I will quickly add it as a source!) where a girl had posted a No Apologies Post. It was cute. I enjoyed reading it at the moment...but later it really inspired me to do my own.

I usually don't post anything about family on my blog. I have my blog linked to my personal facebook page and I'm not sure who all reads it so I don't want to hurt any feelings or even worse invite drama into my life...more than what I already have.

I have had weeks ...actually months of misunderstandings with family and you know what...this is my blog..my space..to be me..I won't go into detail but I think you can get the general idea.
 

I've talked to other family and close friends about our whole situation and everyone has told me to just forget about them and move on...be happy. Now, to be fair, my friends and family only got my side of the story...but I trust them to tell me if I am doing something wrong. And usually they have no problem doing so.....So when everyone you love and trust is telling you that you are just putting yourself and your daughter in a hostile situation that turns into a vicious cycle...why shouldn't I listen and remove ourselves? Why am I not happy about that decision?

 

I've realized after many nights of prayers and tears that I care. I care if my daughter knows what family is. I care that she knows that family is there to take care of you..not to judge you..or to pick sides. I care if she has a relationship with her family. I care that she knows that family is a hiding place to just be you and get away from this crazy world of technology and favoritism.  I care.

But eventhough I care...I can't make them care. I can't make us get along. I can't make them see the world from our viewpoint.

 

I have apologized for what I have done, haven't done, and even for things that didn't even involve me. Forgive. Forget. Move on. Forward Motion. For Lyla. For our future.

 

And then something else happens..It is usually me getting my feelings hurt, our little family being left out of the big picture...or my daughter not being treat fairly..and I go through the vicisous cycle all over again. I Wonder why? What did we do? What are they thinking? How do I solve this? How do I forget it?  Just Forgive, Apologize, and be the better person....

 

But.... I am just about tired of apologies..

 

Why?

Who wouldn't like an apology? That means there is remorse..and things can move on.

 

because they only come from me

I feel like I am saying sorry for everything..even things I haven't done wrong..and for things that I never even knew of..and i'm tired

Let me plug in here and clear up what my definition of an apology is:

• I think an apology is a sincere sorrowful feeling ..a feeling of remorse for something YOU done to hurt someone else
• I do NOT think an apology is you saying your sorry for the way someone FELT because of what YOU done.

An apology is being sorry for YOUR action...not for the way it made someone feel.

i am tired of apologizing for who i am and what i do and don't do...and how I feel

no more..

i'm done

I am who i am.like it or not.

and I am not apologizing for that anymore

No More Apologies!
 

 

Birthday Interview

I was looking for this post to show a friend how I have started interviewing Lyla on each birthday now that she can talk and think on her own ..and because I love hearing her answers..when I realized it never posted! So her birthday was actually in August and it is now December..but I'm pulling the my blog, rules card..so here it is..Lyla's 4th Birthday Interview

It is hard to see the questions..so I will post them below..This lovely interview sheet came from Leelou Blogs

 

*How old are you?

 ..she answered that easily..she has been looking forward to 4

 

*What makes you happy?

I seen exactly what a silly face was ..all 47 of them

 

* What is your favorite animal?

She is always on the hunt for a caterpillar..and a grasshopper. I never thought I would have a bug catching girl!

 

*What is your favorite thing to eat?

She has always called McDonalds "Old McDonalds". When we pull up she automatically says " I want chicken nuggets with fries and a dr pepper and ranch" We don't eat there often..more of a treat kind of thing..so she wants it exactly right when we go!

 

*What is your least favorite thing to eat?

She loves potatoes so I don't where that answer came from

 

*What is your favorite thing to do?

The first time she was in a big pool was at Walt Disney World. Gregg and I made sure we had a good hold on her and we were right beside her so she wouldnt' be scared. Little did I know that she absolutely loves the water and we had a hard time trying to keep up with her. She definitely gets that from her daddy. We are lucky to have a couple parks in our area to play at so she loves to choose which one we go to.

 

*What is your favorite TV show?

I love me some Strawberry Shortcake. She also likes the "big girl show" Jessie

 

*What are you really good at?

She said climbing. OK. I have no idea where that came from.

 

*What is your favorite movie?

Rapunzel is still her favorite. She is still growing her hair out to be just like Rapunzel and we have to measure it every bath time to see how long it is.

 

*What is your favorite color?

..she was very adamant that purple was NOT her favorite color..mean face and all!

 

* What is your favorite song?

Her favorite song is from a Worship Jazz CD that I found at a yard sale..it is kind of like the pop version of "I Love You Lord..and I lift my voice"

 

*Who is your best friend?

Austin and Savannah come to our house for preschool and Trinity was a friend from our old preschool

 

*What do you and mommy do together?

We go to the park. If it is nice outside..we go to the park. Lyla loves it ..it runs out energy and mommy gets mommy time around 9pm! Win! Win!

 

*What do you and Daddy do together?

I think jumping on Daddy is her most favorite past time. I have never seen so much joy in a child's face as when she super jumps on her dad!

 

*Where is your favorite place to go?

We took Lyla to the Alma water park this summer and that started a whole new tradition with this family.

 

*What is your favorite book?

I love to read and I am so blessed that Lyla loves to read. Gregg only reads hunting magazines with pictures so her love for reading definitely came from me. We took a plunge and read a big chapter book..Alice in Wonderland. It wasnt' the novel..although I do plan to work my way up to that..but it was bigger than a children's book and she loved it! I was impressed at how we would stop at a certain part and when we picked it back up she knew where we ended.

 

*What do you want to be when you grow up?

And...last but not least..What four year old doesn't want to be a princess..Heck..I am 28 and I want to be a Princess!