Looking back on Resolutions

I love momental times like this...
the beginning of a new year
the start of a new book

I love beginnings.

It gives me a reason to look back and use this blog efficiently.
That is "why" I blog.
To look back and see what we were doing at this exact moment a year ago..two years ago..and hopefully longer than that if I keep up my blogging habit.

My blog post on Jan 1, 2012 is HERE

I quickly talked about our day and just a couple things I wanted to accomplish this year..

One ....was calling people more and using my thumbs to talk less ...
I can't say I achieved that because I am a texter. I admit it. I text ...a lot!

Two ......was learning more crochet patterns...
I DID accomplish that and I have really enjoyed doing it! I have been making infinity scarves like a mad woman. I love them! I hope they never go out of style.

Three...was running more
I did run more.. not like marathon training running..but running for my health. Of course I stopped when it got amazingly cold outside. But I am looking forward to finding a gym with a nursery for Lyla so I can start back up. I want to lose as much weight as I can while Gregg is at Basic Training.

Four....was taking my photo a day
I think I did pretty good on that. A four year old..two dogs..and a hilarious husband ...pictures get taken all the time!

Five..was to read my bible all the way through
FAIL! Why do I always fail at that? It is sad really. I have read more than five books this year and not one of them were the Bible..the most important book in my life. I did get through a lot of it..but all of it.

Have you started thinking of 2013 Resolutions?
I am narrowing them down..I don't want to have to many..I try to stick with two or three that I can really focus on.


Who am I?

the mom who does not ask anyone to watch my child for me to get a "mommy" break. I was taught that when I have children they are MY responsibility...not my mothers or anyone else for that matter. She is mine and I will take care of her with all of my being.  
the mom who doesn't like to be away from my child AT ALL..call me clingy..call me whatever...I love my daughter. She will go shopping with me and she will go on vacations with me. If children aren't allowed..I probably won't be able to make it.  
the mom who likes to know what my child is doing at all times..if she has ate..if she is feeling OK..I want to know

I am NOT
the mom and woman who invites people over just to have a sit down dinner at the table and talk. Come over and watch the game, come over and play games, come over and craft and I will feed you..but do not expect a formal dinner and chatting.
that girl who doesn't allow herself to be walked on...my daddy would slap me at the age of 28 if I allowed someone to devalue me. If you respect me and my family..we shouldn't have a problem.  
sensitive and I do have feelings...you might not see them all the time..but they are there..and when I push them down for so long..eventually they will come out and you will see them in full force.

a woman who believes that you don't say things " because you were mad " ..I think that is a bunch of bull. I think when you are mad is usually when the truth comes out.

the wife that respects and trusts her husband's judgement. I will go along with what he decides for our family.
a planner...I like to be ahead of schedule and we are always on a schedule.  

a person who does everything right and I am humble enough to admit that.
I don't dress up..
I like jeans and a Tshirt 
I love Jesus, Dr Pepper and Cool Ranch Doritos.
My family is my priority.
my house is never fully cleaned and organized
I'm not perfect
but I am me
all i can offer is me
my side of the story
my view of the world
I can offer a house full of humor, love, and dogs
toys and dress up clothes on the floor
my stories 
my thoughts 
a precious little girl growing up before my eyes
pictures ...probably way to many
heartaches and struggles
moments of joy and blessings

I can offer you a viewfinder into my daily life

but what I can't do 
and what I can not offer 

is me being someone I'm not
trying to make everyone happy and just forgetting how i feel and who I am
trying to fit in when I was never really apart of the picture to begin with

I am not going to pretend that my child is dressed cute every day
my shelves aren't dusted, neither is my ceiling fan, 
I don't like to cook and I barely have time to shave in the shower

All you get here ...is me...in reality...

and I'm not apologizing..
No More Apologies

I think that this has been what God has needed me to go through for a while
a test to see if I am strong enough to be ME
fully me
Don't be afraid to tell your story..Don't be afraid to be YOU

YOU ...in reality

Something you have gone through ..someone else is going through now and may need to hear your imperfect story. Every single story is worth telling. Someone will want to listen.

So am i going to start writing short stories and novels...
No..absolutely not! 

But I am going to write us.. our story ..our life.. in reality.

Here is your viewfinder. I hope you like it.


Are you a Grinch?

Admit it..when the holiday roll around people start to get "Grinch-y"

Some more than others...but we won't go there...
not today

Do you have a friend that really isn't a friend..but you have to include her when your handing out co worker Christmas gifts? ....


that English teacher with the huge wart on her nose that makes you swear she was a witch in another life?

ok...moving on...

Try this...



Click on the captions under the pictures to take you to the blog I found it on. So cute. So easy. So full of a not so subliminal message!

Have a great weekend!


No More Apologies

I was blog hopping around and found a blog (please forgive me because I have no idea which blog it was on..if you are reading this and you know what I am talking about ...leave the blog in the comments and I will quickly add it as a source!) where a girl had posted a No Apologies Post. It was cute. I enjoyed reading it at the moment...but later it really inspired me to do my own.

I usually don't post anything about family on my blog. I have my blog linked to my personal facebook page and I'm not sure who all reads it so I don't want to hurt any feelings or even worse invite drama into my life...more than what I already have.

I have had weeks ...actually months of misunderstandings with family and you know what...this is my blog..my space..to be me..I won't go into detail but I think you can get the general idea.
I've talked to other family and close friends about our whole situation and everyone has told me to just forget about them and move on...be happy. Now, to be fair, my friends and family only got my side of the story...but I trust them to tell me if I am doing something wrong. And usually they have no problem doing so.....So when everyone you love and trust is telling you that you are just putting yourself and your daughter in a hostile situation that turns into a vicious cycle...why shouldn't I listen and remove ourselves? Why am I not happy about that decision?
I've realized after many nights of prayers and tears that I care. I care if my daughter knows what family is. I care that she knows that family is there to take care of you..not to judge you..or to pick sides. I care if she has a relationship with her family. I care that she knows that family is a hiding place to just be you and get away from this crazy world of technology and favoritism.  I care.
But eventhough I care...I can't make them care. I can't make us get along. I can't make them see the world from our viewpoint.
I have apologized for what I have done, haven't done, and even for things that didn't even involve me. Forgive. Forget. Move on. Forward Motion. For Lyla. For our future.
And then something else happens..It is usually me getting my feelings hurt, our little family being left out of the big picture...or my daughter not being treat fairly..and I go through the vicisous cycle all over again. I Wonder why? What did we do? What are they thinking? How do I solve this? How do I forget it?  Just Forgive, Apologize, and be the better person....
But.... I am just about tired of apologies..
Who wouldn't like an apology? That means there is remorse..and things can move on.
because they only come from me
I feel like I am saying sorry for everything..even things I haven't done wrong..and for things that I never even knew of..and i'm tired

Let me plug in here and clear up what my definition of an apology is:
  • I think an apology is a sincere sorrowful feeling ..a feeling of remorse for something YOU done to hurt someone else
  • I do NOT think an apology is you saying your sorry for the way someone FELT because of what YOU done.

An apology is being sorry for YOUR action...not for the way it made someone feel.

i am tired of apologizing for who i am and what i do and don't do...and how I feel

no more..

i'm done

I am who i am.like it or not.

and I am not apologizing for that anymore

No More Apologies!



Birthday Interview

I was looking for this post to show a friend how I have started interviewing Lyla on each birthday now that she can talk and think on her own ..and because I love hearing her answers..when I realized it never posted! So her birthday was actually in August and it is now December..but I'm pulling the my blog, rules card..so here it is..Lyla's 4th Birthday Interview
It is hard to see the questions..so I will post them below..This lovely interview sheet came from Leelou Blogs
*How old are you?
 ..she answered that easily..she has been looking forward to 4
*What makes you happy?
I seen exactly what a silly face was ..all 47 of them
* What is your favorite animal?
She is always on the hunt for a caterpillar..and a grasshopper. I never thought I would have a bug catching girl!
*What is your favorite thing to eat?
She has always called McDonalds "Old McDonalds". When we pull up she automatically says " I want chicken nuggets with fries and a dr pepper and ranch" We don't eat there often..more of a treat kind of thing..so she wants it exactly right when we go!
*What is your least favorite thing to eat?
She loves potatoes so I don't where that answer came from
*What is your favorite thing to do?
The first time she was in a big pool was at Walt Disney World. Gregg and I made sure we had a good hold on her and we were right beside her so she wouldnt' be scared. Little did I know that she absolutely loves the water and we had a hard time trying to keep up with her. She definitely gets that from her daddy. We are lucky to have a couple parks in our area to play at so she loves to choose which one we go to.
*What is your favorite TV show?
I love me some Strawberry Shortcake. She also likes the "big girl show" Jessie
*What are you really good at?
She said climbing. OK. I have no idea where that came from.
*What is your favorite movie?
Rapunzel is still her favorite. She is still growing her hair out to be just like Rapunzel and we have to measure it every bath time to see how long it is.
*What is your favorite color?
..she was very adamant that purple was NOT her favorite color..mean face and all!
* What is your favorite song?
Her favorite song is from a Worship Jazz CD that I found at a yard sale..it is kind of like the pop version of "I Love You Lord..and I lift my voice"
*Who is your best friend?
Austin and Savannah come to our house for preschool and Trinity was a friend from our old preschool
*What do you and mommy do together?
We go to the park. If it is nice outside..we go to the park. Lyla loves it ..it runs out energy and mommy gets mommy time around 9pm! Win! Win!
*What do you and Daddy do together?
I think jumping on Daddy is her most favorite past time. I have never seen so much joy in a child's face as when she super jumps on her dad!
*Where is your favorite place to go?
We took Lyla to the Alma water park this summer and that started a whole new tradition with this family.
*What is your favorite book?
I love to read and I am so blessed that Lyla loves to read. Gregg only reads hunting magazines with pictures so her love for reading definitely came from me. We took a plunge and read a big chapter book..Alice in Wonderland. It wasnt' the novel..although I do plan to work my way up to that..but it was bigger than a children's book and she loved it! I was impressed at how we would stop at a certain part and when we picked it back up she knew where we ended.
*What do you want to be when you grow up?
And...last but not least..What four year old doesn't want to be a princess..Heck..I am 28 and I want to be a Princess!


Day of Honor

I'm participating in the blogger day of silence today to remember those in newtown, Connecticut.

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Day of Silence for Sandy Hook

It is sad to say but this Christmas there is Christmas presents that will not be opened with joy...there will be once happy now awful reminders of this season of family.

As the news came over my TV about the Sandy Hook all I could do was hold my baby and thank God that we have not fallen victim to a tragedy of this kind. I said a quiet prayer for all the families of everyone affected and for a continued hedge of protection around my family.

Many posts and status updates are stating that we have no words for this event..only prayers.
I have words.
So many in fact I don't know how to get them all out.
Maybe in a later post because right now it isn't about my views or thoughts

On Tuesday, December 18th, there will be a blogger day of silence. It isn't a lot. Just symbolizing that we see, we hear, we hurt, and we care. It is our virtual situation as bloggers to pull over to the side of the road when we see a funeral procession. We will post the button and that's it because what words could make these parents and families feel any less hurt?

  If you would like to do more we are also raising money that will go to an organization in the memory of this tragedy. The organization is called The Newtown Family Youth and Family Services. Here is the official description of the support service we are donating to:

"Newtown Youth and Family Services, Inc. is a licensed, non-profit, mental health clinic and youth services bureau dedicated to helping children and families achieve their highest potential. NYFS provides programs, services, activities, counseling, support groups and education throughout the Greater Newtown area.


Please visit THIS PAGE to make your donation.

 We can't imagine how they must be feeling, especially this close to the holidays. I pray that they get the help they need. Whatever that may be. To talk..to cry...to scream...and your donations will help volunteer therapists be there for that.  We would love for you to spread the word on your own blog, Facebook, Twitter, etc. Let's make a difference and use blogging in a positive way. Thank you in advance for participating.

The Blog World

p.s. If you would like to, copy-paste and repost any part of this, please do. Share on.



Good News!! 
So far the world hasn't ended today..
Some people thought the Mayans were wrong and instead of 12/21/12...they thought it was 12/12/12
but not so far! 
I have always been interested in numbers...not math..algebra can jump off a cliff...but numbers.
Call me a geek...I don't care.
But I think it is really cool that today is a rare day and we will not see a day like this according to the numbers until January 1, 2101 ...and we probably won't actually see that day.
You know there are actual people who call themselves numerologists. They take the numbers of your birthday and something else..and can tell you about yourself and your future..if you believe in that sort of thing. I am a skeptic..but I do think it is interesting.
In the world of numerology 12 is considered the number of completeness and represents the end of one cycle and the beginning of another.
Cool that December is the final month of every year...
Every 12 hours day turns to night
I can see why the Mayans think that today would be a changing day in our world

I am a little surprised I haven't seen more blog posts about today..I thought it would be all the rage!  

I have a good friend who I went to school with renewing her vows today just because of the rare occurrence of day. 
Again here is my geekness coming out:
One is a masculine number that means self sufficient and driven
while two is feminine and means she is a true partner
the two numbers together form a balanced union making today an awesome day for tying the knot! 

Well so far today has been uneventful..I hope nothing crazy happens...because I need to run to wal mart and get some Dr Pepper..I'm totally not prepared for the world to go crazy right now!
Enjoy the rest of 2012!


Family Picture Review

I said that when Lyla entered our world we would have family pictures taken every year.
I did good up until this past year.

We had newborn pictures taken:

This is my favorite from her newborn pictures.

What is cuter than a baby in a basket?!
I remember in these newborn pictures; the very first picture we took we stripped Lyla down with no diaper and she peed on me. Very first picture. A welcoming into becoming a mom!
We had 1 year pictures taken:
This is my husband's favorite out of all the pictures we have taken

Lyla had the funniest expressions in this round of pictures. She was a ham that day and made us all laugh the whole time we were trying to take pictures.
Here is 2 year old pictures:
We got together with Gregg's family to take pictures for Mother's Day..so Lyla was still a pretty young two year old..but it counts right?

Here was our end product for Mothers' Day.
And the latest was the three year old pictures:
Again..she was still a very young three in these pictures..but she was officially three so they count!
Because I say so!

I love this one! I love her face. I love the angle. I love it.
You might recognize this one as my bloggy button.

For this years pictures Gregg and I were fighting about something....I can't even remember what it was over so obviously it was very important. I remember telling him to slap on a smile and deal with it. I think they turned out good! I love the "behind the scenes" info on photos.
So now it is on to the 4 year old pictures and I have this month to get them done! I have been slacking..I am a horrible mother! Kidding!
I have our pictures scheduled for Saturday ..THIS Saturday and I have no idea what we are wearing. I am not above going out and buying everyone new clothes to take family pictures in.
One...because I get new clothes
Two..because family pictures mean alot to me! This is my thing. I want to have a picture of us every year.
So what I need from you guys is advice!!
What is the hottest color to wear this season? As you can see we have never really did a "color coordinate" thing but I would like to. I know layering is a cool thing now and it is obviously going to be colder than the dickens when we take these pictures. My fault for waiting until December in Arkansas.
Leave me a link to some of your family pictures so I can get inspired.
Hope you are having a GREAT Tuesday!!


Welcoming our Elf!

This year I decided that we need an elf on the shelf.
First of all because Lyla would love it!
Second of all because I think it will be fun!!

So we picked out our elf at books a million and when we ran into wal mart to get a few things Santa took our elf from our car to take her to the North Pole and give her directions on what she should do.
He left us a note on a napkin to let us know because that's all he could find in the car to write on.

When we got home and Lyla was playing in her room I quickly wrapped the elf and stuck it in the freezer.

When it got good and frosty from "being at the North Pole" I put it on our doorstep, rang the doorbell and high tailed it back to the couch. When I "answered" the door; lyla immediately knew her name was on the tag and it was from Santa!

We read the book and named her sparkles and lyla introduced herself

We left Sparkles in her box on top of the fireplace until she was comfortable enough to get out and roam around.

I'm super excited!!

Oh yea. Lyla is excited too!

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Sparkles the Elf: Week 1

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Happily Ever After 10 years

My mom and my so called step dad have been dating for 10 years. We pretty much consider them married..but in their own time and in their own way they decided to have a wedding.

It was a little country wedding which I think are the best...It was all about family and close family friends.

girls getting ready
how sweet is this?

this is how Lyla stood through the whole ceremony
and this is why my mom is the best grandma in the world
this was HER day
but it wasn't HER day unless it had Lyla in it
Lyla means everything to that woman
Lyla knows it and feels it
I know it and I love it!
and nothing.not even me
compares to her grandma!

this is Lyla looking at me seeing if she is doing it right

Girls in their princess dresses!

My mom and step dad..officially now...bought Lyla her own princess pearl necklace for the wedding

It was beautiful..
It was fun
and now it is official
I have a step dad!
Congratulations Mom and James!
oh and by the way..this happened on October 5th. I'm just really behind!