I've had alot of friends talk to me lately about their marriage. It hurts my heart to see couples struggling. I pray the best for them and their families. I am a firm believer that Satan attack marriages so strongly...because marriage binds two people together and IF those two people bind together with God..along with each other..they are UNSTOPPABLE in whatever they want to do!
Marriage is a powerful thing. Notice I didn't say a "wedding" ...I said a "marriage"
Weddings are beautiful, happy, perfect....and last for a day
Marriage is for a lifetime
Marriage is hard but worth it
Marriage is frustrating but fulfilling
There will be good days and bad days...but through all those days...you have to remember "why" you chose each other..."why" did you take on this journey and choose to embark for the rest of your lives together...
I'm no where near a marriage expert...My husband and I just celebrated five years this past September. Some days I didn't think I would ever see our fifth anniversary.. Some days I thought "What did I get myself into?"
I know now...that there will more days like that...but I love him anyway.. and I know he loves me. I know that love is something I can depend on through anything and sometimes..that love..is all that I had to hang on to.
November is a time where we all start to reflect and become grateful for all that we have.
We are thankful for our family..our jobs..our houses...
But this November..I want to be a bit more specific..
I am thankful for My Husband.
I'm thankful he chose me...five years ago...and everyday since then.
I'm thankful he puts up with me..because Lord I know it isn't easy.
I'm thankful he allows me bad days and temporary whining.
I'm thankful he is happy with me.
I'm thankful that he listens to girly stories about crafts and crocheting.
So this November..on top of being thankful for everything else God has blessed me with...I want to show my husband that I am most thankful for him.
I am taking on a 30 Day Husband Challenge...
Feel free to join me if you like..I would love to hear how things go!
I will be keeping track of what I do..and how our marriage has changed throughout this month...Just for me...Not for statistics...Not for a study...Just to prove to myself that when I give a little more effort from my side..then usually effort from his side comes naturally.
So if you want to join along..I urge you to grab a simple notebook and just write down our challenge for the day...what you did to complete the challenge...and if there was any response...and how you feel about your marriage.
There are just a couple rules:
1. You can't say anything negative about your husband...to your husband...or to anyone else, about your husband.
Negativity feeds negativity. If your friends are slamming their husbands..walk away. It is a vicious cycle..don't get involved.
2. Say something that you admire or appreciate about your husband..to your husband..and to someone else, about your husband.
Just as the previous statement...
Positivity feeds positivity. If you are standing around..and conversation is light..bring up something sweet your husband did or said. I bet you whoever you are with will come up with something that their husband did. Stay in that cycle.
The heart of her husband safely trusts her; so he will have no lack of gain. She does him good and not evil all the days of her life.
I'm just speaking from a wife's point of view...maybe a man will do this study and speak from a man's point of view..or maybe I can convince my husband to answer a few questions for me..don't expect it though!
But these verses speak to me as a husband should be able to safely trust his wife. Wives..we should act in a manner that shows our husbands that they have nothing to worry about. Men are competitive by nature..Sorry men..It's the truth..It is in their blood...and it doesn't stop at age 18. So wives we should give our husbands the knowledge that he has no competition when it comes to you and your love.
Showing this will be different for all men...Some won't care how or if you talk to other men..It won't bother them. Some won't care if you talk (and by talk I mean talking personally or texting...even Facebook...all communication) to other men within an appropriate standard..according to them. And some just don't feel comfortable with it all. None of these are wrong in my opinon...but it is something that needs to be discussed and hopefully talked about BEFORE you get married because this is a subject that can ruin a marriage...very quickly! And neither one will know what happened because neither one will think they did anything wrong.
Moving on to the second part of that verse...she does him good and not evil. By evil I think it means..DON'T NAG and WHINE and COMPLAIN all the time. I know we are women..and we will have days where those things are just inevitable....but they should be the majority of what comes out of our mouth. Husbands will do things to get on your nerves..and sometimes..I think my husband just looks for those things...but wives...pick your battles. If you whine and complain about everything...it brings on a numbing sensation for your husband and he has NO idea what you are talking about. If you do those things sparingly..and then a subject comes up where you complain..then your husband will notice that and pay attention. It's like if you see a woman with dark hair...you see her everyday..with dark hair...you tend to not notice the color of her hair until one day she bleaches it and it is stark white! If it is out of the ordinary..it becomes more noticable.
I know ...I know ...that not complaining about what ALL we do in a day's time is extremely hard. I don't know how I do what all I do within the hours God has given me to do it. And to think there are women that run circles around me and what I do. Call your girlfriend and whine...not about your husband. Call me..Write a letter...Start a journal and get it out....but not to your husband. Unless it is life changing for him..He really doesn't care...Just being Honest...and IF it happens to fall with in football or hunting season..it doesn't matter what it is...He doesn't care and it can wait until March.
I know this is super long..and if you are reading all this...BLESS YOU! They won't be this long as we go on....
Have you ever thanked your husband for choosing you above all other women? I hate to tell you but I'm sure he had an option. He found YOU attractive and appreciated YOUR time. I'm sure circumstances have changed the aspects in your marriage but let your husband know that you are glad God led him to YOU and that you want to be a blessing to him for the rest of your marriage. Let him know that he can trust you and you will be in his corner backing him up!
One of the best opportunities to express your gratitude is first thing in the morning. How do you wake up and greet your husband each morning? Is he confident that you love him? Give him a "wake up call" that he'll never forget - a big "I love you!" and "I'm so glad I'm your wife!"
I just sent my husband a text telling him I loved him and thanked him for choosing me to be his wife and I'm so happy I am!
30 Day Husband Encouragement Challenge by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. Used with permission. Available from www.ReviveOurHearts.com